Guest Post: Pretty in the Bedroom


Today’s guest post comes to you from Theresa Philbin, owner of Touch Boutique. Theresa is a registered nurse, and through her shop she helps ladies of all ages and all shapes feel confident and comfortable in the bedroom. She loves fielding any and all questions about relationships, intimacy, and bringing back the spark and strives to make Touch a thoroughly woman-friendly store. Check out the Touch website here, but be aware that the shop sells lingerie and intimate accessories and toys so not safe for work!

Theresa has offered to share some ideas for those of us who struggle to feel beautiful in intimate situations, during sex, and in the bedroom.

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Just before I opened my lingerie store I had an interesting conversation with a dear friend that has influenced the way I buy for my store. It began by me asking her, “When, if ever, do you wear lingerie in the bedroom?”

Her: ”Lingerie??!! I sleep in boxers and an over-sized t-shirt. I feel like I’m wearing lingerie when my PJ’s match.”

Me: “Why?”

Her:” I wouldn’t know what to buy and all those stores seem intimidating when you don’t have the body of a 20-year-old anymore.”

As her husband quietly nodded, I realized the mission of Touch would be to find lingerie that would fit women of all shapes and sizes and give them the same level of comfort and security that a pretty pair of matching PJs could.

What makes a woman feel pretty in the bedroom is as varied as what makes a woman feel pretty going out to dinner or shopping. At the end of the day it’s about what makes each of us feel attractive and comfortable as individuals. With that in mind, here are some ideas for selecting your perfect P.M. ensemble:

  1. Fabrics that feel good on your skin: Lace is undeniably gorgeous but bad lace is just itchy. When selecting lingerie, I recommend putting your hands on the garments to see if you like the texture of the silk, modal, or cotton. It’s hard to feel like you are at your best when things are chafing and you are itching to the point of distraction.
  2. Items that fit and play up your favorite assets: Love your legs? Go short. Gorgeous, ample bosom? A top with good support is a must. Prefer to downplay your tummy or hips? The baby-doll style is your best bet. There are sizes and styles to fit every body shape, though many lines will have sizing discrepancies from item to item. Try multiple sizes in each garment, and remember that an item that works in a medium in one brand may need to be a large in another. Work with sales associates to make sure you’re getting the best fit, and don’t be shy about asking for recommendations that will help you show off your favorite figure aspects.
  3. Color: When it comes to lingerie women gravitate toward black because we’ve been taught that black “hides a multitude of sins.” (We all know that there are no real sins when it comes to body shape and size, right?) But looking good in bright colors has a lot to do with the correct fit and style, and colorful lingerie can actually be more flattering as the right colors will warm and brighten your skin tone. Opting for colorful bedroom attire can lift your spirits and change your mood.
  4. Who are you wearing it for? This question trips people up at times. Many women say, “I don’t have anyone to wear it for,” to which I reply, “How about wearing it for yourself just to feel pretty?” Marie Colvin, a famous war journalist, always wore La Perla lingerie under her clothes on assignment because doing so reminded her of her femininity and was something just for her. Lingerie is meant to make you feel good and if your partner happens to like it as well, that’s just a bonus! I share this approach with the well-meaning significant others that come in to buy something special for their partners. “How will she feel in this?” and “Is the pasty-garter-thong set the ‘real her’?” are just a couple of the questions that are asked. I frequently recommend a soft cotton and lace sleep set in place of more complex or revealing options. It covers just enough that most women feel great but not over-exposed, and getting up with kids in the middle of the night won’t make anyone feel uncomfortable.
  5. Attitude: None of the above will be worth anything if you put an item on and immediately shrink into yourself. At Touch Boutique we know when you’ve put on “the right one.” A smile, a spin, and a little giggle is exactly what we look for in our customers, and all women deserve to look and feel their best. Looking pretty is feeling pretty, and sometimes both can be accomplished just by putting on a pair of matching PJs.

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What questions do you have for Theresa? Let us know!

Image via Touch FB page.

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10 Responses to “Guest Post: Pretty in the Bedroom”

  1. Annabeth

    I was really excited to check the lingerie out – but the Touch website doesn’t seem to offer any? This is bizarre.

  2. threegoodrats

    Nice post! I just visited the Touch website and couldn’t find lingerie anywhere. Is there a direct link to that part of the store?

  3. Anneesha

    I’m 52 and getting married soon, with tropical honeymoon scheduled. What are your suggestions for hot lingerie with the “ample bosom” support you mentioned? Legs/hips are good, little roll around the waist to disguise… Thanks!

    • Theresa

      There are some great lines both in the store and on line that I would recommend. A good corset always looks good and most are cut a little longer in the front to hide a bit of a tummy. Also, look for separates so you can order the correct size for top and bottom.

  4. Sally

    Baaaah. My bad, friends. There is lingerie in the actual shop here in the Twin Cities – the photo at top is from Touch Boutique, and the staff do work with customers on fittings. I cruised the site to make sure it wasn’t too over-the-top, but didn’t make the connection that their lingerie wasn’t for sale on it. Theresa’s advice is general and positive and not specific to her own wares, of course. But I’ve asked her if any lingerie items will be added anytime soon.

  5. Theresa

    I am sorry that there is some frustration regarding the web site. As a small boutique with limited size runs on the lingerie lines we have chosen not to sell on-line. Each brand is sized so differently that we prefer customers come in the store and try it on to insure complete satisfaction. If you would like to view what we have in the store, please go to our Facebook site as we post lingerie pictures there. Don’t hesitate to call the store if you have any further questions.