Posts Tagged: advice

Reader Request: Internal Style Conflicts

What do you do when your dressing preferences clash with expert recommendations for flattering your figure?

Reader Sarah e-mailed this request to me:

I’m short and small-boned and hourglass-shaped, and I can find lots of advice for dressing that body type (full skirts, v-necks, nipped waists, tailored pants, etc.). However, I feel like there’s a clash between my body type and other elements: my face (apple-cheeked, not conventionally pretty), my hair (very short), and my personality (tomboyish, casual). When I wear skirts and dresses, which I do think suit my body, I feel very self-conscious, like I don’t match what I’m wearing. Clothes that I feel more like myself in (bootcut jeans, casual graphic tees) do not make me look my best. I wonder if other women struggle with this type of conflict, and how they deal with it. read more

Originally posted 2013-07-31 06:05:30.

Reader Request: Insecurity, Jealousy, and Closeness

Reader K e-mailed me with this question:

I’ve always dealt with insecurity issues and some of them go beyond body image into the range of general personality, so I understand that some of this is probably beyond the scope of what you’d write about for the blog. My brother-in-law has a somewhat-long-term girlfriend that makes me feel incredibly intimidated and insecure, but it’s not intentional on her part and the problem lies entirely with me. The fact that it’s my problem and is something I logically know I shouldn’t feel insecure over adds to me feeling frustrated and ashamed of myself, on top of feeling crappy and inadequate as a person. At the start of this year, I decided to work on feeling good about myself so that I can feel better as I go about my life and hopefully have a good relationship with whoever my BIL may marry on down the line. This has manifested itself in a few different ways and directions, one of which is the style angle (and thus, your blog). read more

Originally posted 2013-04-22 06:03:14.

Observe and Reserve Judgment

PSW 2

There are magazine columns, websites, and television shows built around the practice of examining fashion choices and making fun of them. They focus mainly on celebrities, but regular people get caught in the crossfire, too, occasionally. And while constructive criticism is an important tool for learning, most of these people and outlets aren’t interested in teaching style lessons.* They’re interested in generating clicks and gaining viewership by tearing down people who aren’t present to explain their choices or join the discussion. And at this point, judging others for their clothing choices has becomeĀ such a commonplace activity that it seldom registers as anything other than normal. If it is normal, it shouldn’t be. read more

Originally posted 2015-02-02 07:32:36.